Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Back That Fish Up

You got me: I'm listening to Juvenile's epic soliloquy "Back That Azz Up". I'm also eating a fish feast. Seriously, I don't know if it's that I cook fish like I was raised in the Red Lobster (assuming the Red Lobster's great- I wouldn't know since I haven't eaten there in probably two decades...), or if it's just that I love seafood (in which case I should probably hit up the all-you-can-eat shrimp at the Red Lobster...). Either way, I just want to point out that "you's a fine motha-f****a, won't you back that azz up!"

Terrifically Great-Fantastically Wonderful Fish

1 lb +- (plus or minus) 0.25 lb Mahi Mahi
1 tbsp H.E.B. brand South Carolina BBQ Sauce
Dashes Soy Sauce
Dash Fish Sauce
Dash Oyster Sauce
Dash Srirachi
Sesame Oil
The Artist Known for "Push-It" to Taste

~1 lb Asparagus

Coat a cast iron skillet with Sesame Oil and mix all the non-fish items in a bowl minus the "The Artist Known for 'Push-It'". "The Artist Known for 'Push-It'" the slick skillet (yes, this is a euphemism for President Bill Clinton). Put in the Mahi Mahi skin up. Let sizzle for a moment or two. Then flip and coat with a sauce created by mixing all the remaining ingredients to taste. Let cook for a moment or two... possibly the length of a short song like "Please Play This Song on the Radio" by NOFX" or roughly half the length of "Push-It". Then recklessly throw in the Asparagus. Let cook until Asparagus tastes right. Serve. Garnish with the last drizzles of sauce and you'll love this for chizzles.

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