Friday, August 12, 2011

The High Life

The last Friday of summer vacation and this is what I do with it. Wow. Don't expect me to do this ever again, but as you'll see when you watch the video, this was a special occasion and special occasions sometimes warrant special posts. I wrote the lyrics after having listened to Nicki Minaj for hours and Kanye West for years. But I can't sing, obviously, so I downloaded an auto-tune program to help me sound like T-Pain who also cannot sing. I still sound bad. It's like Count Dracula if he were straight out of white Compton.

I am sorry for some of the language. I blame the media.

Seriously I can't believe I'm posting this. It's amazing the things I'm willing to do online that I would never admit to in the real world.

One final note, I just watched the video one last time in disbelief and apparently the quality was dropped in the posting. I'm sorry if some of the educational text was lost, but I'm too tired and embarrassed to try and fix it.

The High Life
By The Gourmet Apartment

F--- the big breweries and their MGD
Give me less choice than the KGB
You want some good s---
You gotta get it from me
A liquid effigy
Like a G
From my home-brewery

Hop hop hop hop hop hop hop
Hershbrucker an-
Hallertauer an-
I got copper to my left
Stainless to my right
15 barrels boiling
Whirlpool is in sight

I'm a pro
I profess
Now I write the test
No longer impressed
By your protein rest
At the bar, to ingest
I'm yours to request
I'm the best
Mothaf------; it's no contest

I'd like to slow things down a little
For all the ladies out there who say they don't like beer
Now I'm not saying you're not hot
All I'm saying is

Drink me, drink me, say that you'll drink me
Brew me, brew me, so you can drink me
Pour me, share me, ménage à trois
Smell me, taste me, drink me so raw
I can't drink no other lover, but you


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